Shame on Me!

My last post on here was nearly two years ago - hard to believe that I haven't exercised my writing muscle much since. Although looking at the last two posts, which were more personal in nature, it's amazing how much my life has changed between now and then. Apparently my last post occurred the day before joining cross fit, a workout program that has changed my life in such a significant manner that it's difficult to quantify in words. When I first began I was around 205 pounds - I wouldn't say I was fat, but I was certainly thick and noticed that I had begun deleting more photos than not, prior to posting. Due in part to a stagnant workout routine, boredom with gym culture in general and plantar fasciutis (ie, excrutiating foot pain related to running), I was out of shape and feeling terribly down about myself. My brother Kyle, who is now a Physical Therapist fellow for Duke's athletic teams, had been pressuring me to try cross fit as a cure and as a means of getting in shape. I made excuses for awhile, partially due to intimidation (these guys are fit and those workouts are tough!), and partially because of the financial (at around $175 a month, it's not a cheap investment). As someone pointed out to me, it's better to spend more money on a workout regime in order to feel good about your body as opposed to money on clothing you hope will mask the fact that you aren't feeling so good about yourself. And as for the fit guys - in the beginning I considered them inspiration and now I think of them as competition - what can I say, once a competitor, always one. Now, nearly two years later I'm a big fan of the sport and go 4 or 5 times a week. I fluctuate between 180 and 185 pounds, depending on the intensity of that weeks workouts, but more importantly I feel great and have begun to reengage myself with some running races. I can't imagine returning to a standard gym again, and additionally I have restructured my life so that I'm a morning workout kind of guy - which has made for tremendously productive days and socially available evenings. In addition to retooling my body, I also finally was able to escape the clutches of pharmaceutical advertising and it's soul-crushing hours. I was doing well for myself - I had a fancy title and quadrupled my salary in 6 years, but I wasn't proud of the products I was working on or the hours I was putting in. Because Americans would never give up their drugs (or alcohol!), I managed to fjord the financial collapse with ease - in fact, my career soared during those years. But new doors have opened for me, and now I do similar work for Hearst Publications, and recently launched a product that people know and that I'm proud of - a website for Town & Country magazine. I'm now working on a site redesign for Harpers BAZAAR, which is going to be an amazingly cool project and a fantastic addition to my portfolio. As with any job there are some things I don't love about it, but I'm doing well and apparently making a good name for myself. Even better, I start each day knowing that I'll be done by 5.30 nearly every day - which can also have a remarkable effect on your outlook on life. I can make social plans and stick with them instead of cancelling because I'm stuck late working on another client deliverable. More importantly, and part of the reason that I'm doing this entry, is that I know I need to start making more time for myself to pursue some freelance writing opportunities. Another big change in my life was the addition of a Sela to my immediate family. Bear Michael Sela was born in October of 2012 and I became an Uncle for the first time. Happily I've been able to see him a fair number of times in the past 15 months of his life, but I hope to be a better uncle to him in the future. He is gonna be a such a great kid and I can't begin to express how happy it is to know that he is in my life. I suppose the largest single change that happened since that last post would be the ending of my 4.5 year relationship with Kevin only two weeks later. I won't get in details - there aren't many to share really. It happened suddenly and unexpectedly - while there were certainly issues that needed to be addressed, it didn't seem as though they were that significant at that time. Still, it's over, and when it happened in a half hour talk, it was the last time we saw each other or spoke for 3 months, which is hard to imagine. Even now we barely communicate, which saddens me tremendously. I suppose it's not uncommon for this to happen between exes, but I do wish I had more incite into what is going on with his life - which I suppose shouldn't be that hard to find out if I made more of an effort to stay in touch with him. I'm sure the sentiment is mutual and I will try to make more of an effort to reach out to him this year as a result. So the last two years have been interesting being back on the market for dating. I've met plenty of people and have enjoyed going on some of the most random-ass dates, which I suppose could be fodder for blog posts in the future. They say love is tough to find in NYC, but I doubt that anyone outside the city and isn't with someone would feel much differently about their locale. I am enamored with someone currently - an amazing, funny, smart, sexy guy who never fails to bring a smile to my face and treats me sweeter than I have ever been treated before. But again, this is perhaps material best left for a future post. I can't come back after a two year hiatus and convey everything that's been on my mind since in just one post now, can I?